My Boys and Me

and SUMMER IS OVER! Most parents (especially the Moms that stay home with their kids) are ecstatic hearing the words BACK TO SCHOOL. For me though, it is also the end of a 4 month “break.” In the 4 months I was BLESSED to have without any (out side of the home) responsibility, I enjoyed myself so much and considered it an absolute luxury. Mike, Mikey and I went to VA in late May, we went and visited my parents for a week as a family (which included going to a Phillies game), and I went back to my parents for a glorious week ALONE. In between trips, I thoroughly enjoyed the time I spent catching up on things and erasing things off my to-do list, reading more books than I usually read in a year-3 to be exact- (“Love the one your with,” “For Women Only,”- Mike actually read “For Men Only” and finished before me- and “90 Minutes in Heaven”). I recommend ALL of them- Especially the “For Men” and “For Woman”series, and spending so much time with family and friends. Both boys, despite being coated with SPF 50 sunscreen every day, (you’ve seen the picture) have adorable little farmer’s tans from being at the pool so much. Mikey has actually advanced his lack of fear to include jumping in the pool (TWICE) the minute we enter the pool area- one with his swimmer on and once WITHOUT. Fortunately the “without” time had nothing to do with me. I was not there, didn’t see it and never would have known had Mike not told me. I’m so glad he DID tell me because it has reminded me not to get so comfortable just because he can swim great with his swimer on. Mikey has no clue of his limits. When Mike took the swimmer off to see if Mikey could swim from him to me, Mikey was extremely irritated with being held and when he went straight under after Mike let him go he simply laughed. He did hold his breath though. He kept saying, “see ya” and would run around the pool area jumping in whenever he felt like it and we’d have to dash after him. 10 minutes of this game and his swimmer was back on. By swimmer I mean this suit he wears that allows him to swim almost perfectly without any help (and without drowning). We are signing him up for swimming lessons and want him swimming SOON! He loves the water so much and I just want to ease some of MY fears of him around it.

So, along with Braeden going back to school (this morning- I cried) comes me going back to work. I’m actually not 100 percent sure WHAT I will be doing. Part of the reason I didn’t work all summer was because I was offered a nanny job that didn’t start until school started and the other being that childcare for the boys would have sorta made the amount of money I’d earn a wash. Mike’s Mom is WONDERFUL, but having Mikey, Sayelor, Braeden and Harley ALL summer would have been too much. She wouldn’t have even been able to fit them all in the car. SO, up until last week when we discovered how much money we’d have to set aside to pay taxes on the cash I would earn nannying, as well as the cost it would be for Braeden’s after school care- Mike’s Mom is no longer able to pick him up since Sayelor’s Mom had her baby and she would not be able to fit Sayelor, the baby and Mikey in the car (with Braeden)- I was looking forward to working for Nicole and watching her 2 GIRLS! After Mike and I weighed things financially, it didn’t really make sense anymore. SO, I’ve been on one interview, sent numerous resumes out and will help Nicole until something full time comes along (she was SO understanding). One thing I’ve realized is that after being home for 4 months and being away from my “career” for 3 years (I was a legal assistant before having Mikey), I am ready and eager to go back into the “REAL” world. When I worked as a nanny, I was happy, but still felt I needed more in my life than just being a wife and a mother (not to say that full time Moms don’t do enough- major credit goes to all of them), but for me I just enjoyed having an outlet. Being a nanny is just like being a mother- just with different kids and therefore didn’t provide that outlet. That being said, I was so intimidated going back to “work” after being off for so long. I literally suffered panic attacks each time I tried. God always seems to take every yucky situation and turn it into something good. As much as I’ve loved and enjoyed being home with the boys, the past few months, it was a struggle financially and only by the grace of God and my husband’s dedication to working as much as he could so that I could have an (UNdeserved break to regroup) did we make it work. God changed my mind and attitude toward “working” and towards the thought of being away from the boys so much. I actually feel as though I NEED it. Sure, it can be stressful working full time and only seeing the boys for an hour or 2 a day, BUT I do remember the rewarding feelings I had when I accomplished something (other than changing diapers or applying sun screen) and how much I cherished and enjoyed my family when with them. I actually MISS having something in my life independent of my family and more than anything I want so desperately to relieve some of the pressure Mike feels financially. Me working full time will actually OPEN a lot of doors for us rather than close them. So, the search is on. I pray so much for the right opportunity that will allow me to learn and grow. I will keep you posted.

So, how bout those boys that have driven me so crazy that I actually WANT to go back to work (JK….-well sorta). Hehe
Mikey- has his days. He can be sweet as pie one day and then a terror the next. He was SO SO bad the other day (maybe that was the day I had the inclination of wanting to go back to work)? In general, he is such a little joy and constantly has me laughing. He has the most precious southern accent I have ever heard and his sun bleached blond hair makes him look like a little surfer dude. He still does not like being in trouble, but is so sweet when he says he is sorry and the look on his face shows us he means it. He is forming longer sentences every day and although he is stubborn as ever, we can now reason with him (we lie a lot) Baby Einstein videos are still his favorite. He LOVES Fire Trucks and gets excited every time we approach the station near our house. He is also madly in love with anything that has to do with trains. We are planning a trip to see the ”real” Thomas the Train in October. We will even get to go on a 15 minute ride on him. Can your guess what he’s going to be for Halloween?!
Braeden has enjoyed the last month of his summer vacation relaxing at home playing baseball on his Play Station 3, swimming, spending almost every night with Harley and seeing lots of movies (most recently G I Joe with Daddy).
By sheer coincidence he got the teacher he wanted this year (a male) and Mike and I really like him too. I can’t believe he is in second grade!!!!! Where has the time gone? I cried today when I dropped him off and saw all the kindergarteners. They were so SMALL. He is also looking forward to playing fall baseball on Saturdays through Nov. Yay! Braeden’s baseball games AND Major League playoffs at the same time! Have I ever mentioned before how much I love baseball? Just checking.

Alright, I hope you have a great week. Do you think I beat the record for the longest blog?

Here’s the boys enjoying their last day of summer- (its still so humid here that the camera got foggy)

Braeden’s first day of 2nd grade!